In the middle of June, I started to date again. My mom told me it was too early but I needed something to do to occupy my time. Actually my favorite quote was from one night when I was particuarlly upset because two guys I had asked to come out to a campfire said no. Mom's response, "Well, you DO have a lot of baggage AND a baby." Gee mom thanks for that pep talk.

Fast forward to now, I have a beautiful almost 2 year old, who is so smart and potty training herself! I have a 1/2 Title 1 job at the same elementary school. It's less hours than I had last year but nearly double the pay (I'm actually contracted now), and I have been dating a truely sweet, amazing man for a month now.Tonight Isabelle wouldn't go to sleep so I put Winne the Pooh in for us to watch. My bf came over to watch it with us, so we all sat on the couch. Izzy on my lap leaning on pillows and bf on the other side with his head on my shoulder. It truely felt amazing and as much as it terrifies me I was left wondering if this could be a foreshadowing of the future. (really honestly and truely, I'm try really hard to take this slow. And honestly and truely, it's super hard!)

An End and a New Start

It's all official, papers are signed, deed is turned over, belongings split.
I'm still mourning for the life I'd planned for with him but also looking forward to the future.
I look back and see the things he should have done differently but also things I should have done too.
The other night I found my journal that I had started when I went to England. I read it (right before bed of course). Then I came to my last two entries. They were from the night before and night of my first date with Scot. If only I had known then it was all an act.

Here's to the future..... A New Beginning...... Here's to Life

It's nearly over

Yesterday was our final hearing. We came to an agreement. Scot has custody every other weekend from Saturday at 8 am to Tuesday at 7 pm. Then on off weeks he has her from Monday at 5 to Wednesday morning.
I'm happy with it. Izzy will get to see both of her parents. I'm not quite sure how I'm really feeling right now. A bit of relief, sadness, I don't know a combo of everything.
Now we just wait for the revisions and then it'll be final.

A New Beginning

Today marks the start.
I moved back to my parents house boxes and memories in tow. It was a physically and emotionally tough day. It's a relief to be here at my own place but it's still hard. I don't think I'll ever understand why this is happening and I'm not sure that he knows exactly why he filed for divorce either.
It's his weekend with Tickles so I can get unpacked and settled in myself. He wants to keep her til Tuesday but I want her back on Monday. I'll save that arguement for tomorrow. Tonight I'm just going to focus on getting the clothes off my bed, taking a shower, and going to sleep!